What is wisdom?
Listen to this….
and read this…Living What You Know
Sam Harris once said, “On one level, wisdom is nothing more profound than the ability to follow one’s own advice” (Harris, 2014). That line struck me, because it reveals something deceptively simple: wisdom is not about what you know — it’s about whether you live it.
On my own path of growth — as a coach, a therapist-in-training, and a student of human relationships and life — I’ve gathered a lot of knowledge. I’ve studied communication skills, accountability, and emotional awareness. I read, my IG algorithm is thoughtfully curated, serving me up self-help quotes by the baker’s dozen. I reflect and journal almost every day.
All to say, the inputs and flow of knowledge are not the problem. And the question that remains is this: Am I living what I know?
And if I’m not, what’s stopping me?
The Gap Between Knowing and Living
It’s easy to learn something from a book. It’s harder to bring that knowledge into the messy, unpredictable space of real relationships. Reading about empathy is one thing; practicing it with your partner when you feel triggered is another.
As Will Durant wrote, “Nothing learned from a book is worth anything until it is used and verified in life. Only then does it begin to affect behavior and desire. It is life that educates, and perhaps love more than anything else in life” (Durant, 1926).
Wisdom, then, requires translation: from head to heart, from theory to practice, from “knowing about” to “living as.”
Fear, Love, and False Stories
When I reflect on where I fall short, fear often sits at the center — fear of being vulnerable, fear of being hurt, fear shaped by old stories and past traumas.
Instead of staying open, I close in. Instead of listening to the person in front of me, I rehearse narratives in my head — evidence I’ve gathered that supports my fear. And like the new-car phenomenon — technically called the Baader-Meinhof phenomenon (also known as the frequency illusion): a cognitive bias where, after you notice something new, like buying a car, you then start seeing it everywhere. This creates the false belief that it has become more common. The effect arises through selective attention, where your brain focuses on the new thing, and confirmation bias, where you look for and find evidence to support your feeling that the new thing is more frequent (Arnold, 2019).
In the same way, the story I hold becomes the only story I see.
This is the opposite of wisdom. It’s not taking in new data; it’s spinning inside old ones.
A Practice of Turning Toward
Lately, I’ve been using a simple prompt in the mornings and evenings:
“Am I living what I know?”
If the answer is no, I ask: “Am I turning away from the places where I fall short — or turning toward them with curiosity?”
Wisdom isn’t about flawless execution. It’s about awareness, honesty, and the willingness to practice. It’s about closing the gap, little by little, between what we know and how we live.
So, What Is Wisdom?
Wisdom is not the accumulation of insights, quotes, or tools. It’s the moment you bring them alive in your daily choices. It’s choosing curiosity over judgment, love over fear, presence over stories.
Put simply: wisdom is living what you know.
References
Arnold, J. (2019). The Baader-Meinhof phenomenon: Cognitive bias and frequency illusion. Psychology Today. Retrieved from https://www.psychologytoday.com
Durant, W. (1926). The Story of Philosophy. Simon and Schuster.
Harris, S. (2014). Waking Up: A Guide to Spirituality Without Religion. Simon & Schuster.