Coaching vs. Therapy

Written By Sarah Stinson

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and read this…

The Same Map, Different Roads

There’s a question I get a lot — sometimes whispered like it’s taboo, sometimes tossed out over coffee like it’s nothing: “So… what’s the difference between coaching and therapy?”

And it’s a fair question. Both involve talking, reflecting, unpacking, crying (occasionally), and the occasional “aha” moment that feels like emotional chiropractic work. Both are about growth and change. Both can change your life.

But while coaching and therapy might share a map — the terrain of being human — they take different roads to help you find your way home.

The Work of Looking Back vs. Moving Forward

Therapy often begins with why.
Why do I feel this way?
Why do I keep repeating the same patterns?
Why does my inner critic sound suspiciously like my older sister?

Therapy looks backward to make sense of what’s been, to heal the old wounds so you can live more freely in the present. It’s the work of excavating — unearthing the past to understand how it still shapes you.

Coaching, on the other hand, starts from where you are now and asks, “Where do you want to go?” It’s less about the archaeology of your pain and more about the architecture of your becoming.

If therapy is a slow, tender excavation, coaching is more like cartography — mapping out the terrain ahead and helping you take the next step with clarity and intention.

Different Tools, Same Humanity

Therapists are trained to diagnose, treat, and clinically support mental and emotional health. Their domain includes trauma, anxiety, depression, and other areas where clinical expertise matters deeply.

Coaches, on the other hand, don’t diagnose — we partner. We meet you in the space between who you’ve been and who you’re becoming. We ask the questions that help you see yourself clearly, take ownership, and act from choice instead of habit.

And while I will often look at and touch on the why in my coaching practice, it’s more for a deepened awareness, rather than a practice in unpacking that and handling any deeper trauma that might be there. I am trauma-informed, and if the need is present, my clients and I discuss what additional support they may need. I don’t step outside my scope or area of expertise, but I can be a guide to finding and identifying what modalities might help support their growth. My goal is to help my clients spiral up in all areas of their lives, even if I am not the one they need at the time to help them do that.

Both paths require honesty, curiosity, and a willingness to sit with discomfort. Both can help you meet yourself — therapy through healing, coaching through action.

As Will Durant wrote, “Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance.” Therapy and coaching are both forms of education, just with different syllabi.

I had a jaw-dropping moment when I read this quote by Norwegian writer Arne Garborg, “To love someone is to learn the song in their heart and sing it to them when they have forgotten.” My work with my clients is often about reminding them of who they are and helping them fully become that.

The Gray Space Between

The truth is, life doesn’t organize itself neatly into “therapy” or “coaching.” There’s overlap. Sometimes what starts as coaching veers into therapeutic territory, and sometimes what begins in therapy sparks a hunger for action that coaching supports beautifully.

I often think of them as rhythm and melody — distinct, but made richer when played together. Therapy helps you understand your song; coaching helps you sing it out loud.

Or, as Maria Popova might say, both are “tools for the art of becoming.” Therapy helps you understand your materials — the pigments and textures of your experience — while coaching helps you paint with them.

Which Is Right for You?

If you’re in deep pain, struggling to function, or healing trauma — therapy is the right space.

If you’re ready to move forward, to build habits, systems, or a vision that feels aligned with who you are now — coaching might be the work.

But more important than labels is this question: “What kind of support do I need right now?”

Because sometimes we need to look back and heal. Sometimes we need to look forward and act.

And sometimes, if we’re honest, we need both — someone to hold our history with compassion and help us step into what’s next.

The Common Thread

Whether you’re in therapy, coaching, or that liminal space between the two, the work is the same at its core: to live more honestly, to see yourself clearly, and to practice being who you already are beneath the noise.

In the end, therapy helps you make peace with your past. Coaching helps you make promises to your future. And wisdom — the kind Will Durant might call “verified in life” — is learning to live what you know, right here, in the present.

References

Sarah Stinson
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